Battlefield

Dear Gary—

I think I’ve finally cracked my code. I occasionally wonder why I enjoy some subpar Doctor Who serials more than others. I have decided that it is because while I can forgive the odd poorly constructed script and shoddy effects, I can’t get on board if there are no characters that I find interesting or worthwhile. Therefore, I can gladly re-watch almost any Doctor Who with the first, second, and fourth Doctor because I am fond of the Doctor himself as well as his companions. The same is true to a lesser extent with the third Doctor. With the fifth and sixth, however, I find for the most part that I need at least one guest actor I can relate to in order to overcome any glaring defects. So far the seventh Doctor is falling more into that latter category, although not to the same degree. Thus I like The Power of Kroll more than I do Kinda; The Invasion more than Attack of the Cybermen; and Silver Nemesis more than Dragonfire.

This is a longwinded way of saying that I like Battlefield despite the fact that more often than not I have trouble following it. Any Doctor Who serial that has Brigadier Lethbridge-Stewart is a good Doctor Who serial, even if the Brig is confined to a helicopter for half the story. In addition, Battlefield has the stellar Jean Marsh as Morgaine as well as the delightful pairing of Brigadier Winifred Bambera and Ancelyn. To top it all off there is a wonderful monster in the Destroyer (even if poorly used) and some decent locations. All of this makes up for the fact that the story makes little sense.

My basic confusion: Who are these aliens? Where do they come from? Why are they here? What are they after? Why are they fighting each other? I don’t think they know the answer to half of these questions.

Knights straight out of the Arthurian legend have arrived in twentieth century Earth from what appears to be outer space since they initially come hurtling down in a blaze of glory, but then we are told that actually they have entered our world sideways in time from another dimension and have gateways they can travel through. Then there is also a dimensional traveling spacecraft parked at the bottom of Lake Vortigern, and who knows how long that thing has been rusting away down there with no one the wiser.

Mordred and his mother Morgaine bring a contingent of soldiers with them while King Arthur is represented by the lone Ancelyn. The first engagement between these battling knights is difficult to read. Dressed in full armor, visors down, we have no clue who is who, why they are fighting, or what the difference is between one side and the other, if indeed there is a difference; for all we know this is an AWOL soldier that is being chased down by the MPs.  Every subsequent battle scene is as confusing as the first, even when there is a clear definition between otherworldly knights and twentieth century military there is no semblance of rhyme or reason to any of the fights.

Nor is there a mad rush to retrieve Excalibur, which seems to be the reason for everyone being there. Once Excalibur is found, it doesn’t do much of anything. It’s only purpose seems to be to bring Arthur to life, and since Arthur has long since been turned to dust it doesn’t even do that. There are no other magical powers associated with it; the bearer of the sword doesn’t seem to have any undue advantage in combat. It’s not even hard to get one’s hands on, either. Ace pulls it out of the stone with no problem and from there it passes from person to person with barely a notice. Morgaine does use it to create her portal home, but it appears as though any sword would do in a pinch; and anyway, why does the Doctor want to stop her leaving? Let her and Mordred return to whence they came and be done with it. What does the Doctor think UNIT is going to do with the pair? It seems a much more dangerous proposition to keep them on twentieth century Earth than to allow them to slip back sideways through dimensions to their own world.

Into this mix we add one nuclear missile and a UNIT convoy, but what exactly is this UNIT convoy escorting a nuclear missile doing camping beside Lake Vortigern? They seem to be stuck, perhaps as a result of equipment failure due to Morgaine’s mystical powers or magical disturbances associated with the traveling knights, but what were they doing down there by the lake to begin with? Did Bambera decide to make a picnic of it at the historical landmark? There doesn’t even seem to be a road on which they traveled; they are simply parked there in the grass along the shore.

As if this were not enough, we have a bunch of miscellaneous characters thrown at us for no good reason and who are carted off half way through. (And by the way since when can the Doctor hypnotize people into doing his will by sheer power of suggestion?) Not to mention a scabbard, which we are told is worth ten times the sword, but since Excalibur turns out to be worth next to nothing what does that make the scabbard? Turns out exactly that—nothing.

Finally we have the Destroyer, a perfectly marvelous Doctor Who monster who is extremely superfluous. Morgaine calls forth this frightening blue creature to aid in her cause, but she already has Mordred and the gang on top of her own considerable powers. The Destroyer seems a bit of overkill, especially since she is afraid of him herself and keeps him bound in silver chains, and especially since her cause of obtaining Excalibur seems easily accomplished with no outside help required.

This much ado about nothing backdrop provides the perfect setting for Bambera and Ancelyn who add a light romantic comedy element that is rarely seen in Doctor Who. “She vanquished me,” Ancelyn says with that boyish grin on his face that never seems to leave; Ancelyn is as much a lover as a fighter. Bambera is more a fighter, but Ancelyn eventually wins her heart.

However it is Morgaine and the Brigadier who are the real standouts in Battlefield.

“What is victory without honor?” Morgaine and the Brigadier are both soldiers of honor and they recognize each other as such.

Morgaine: “A warrior no less. How goes the day?”

Brigadier: “I’ve had better.”

Morgaine: “I am Morgaine the Sunkiller. Dominator of the thirteen worlds and Battle Queen of the S’Rax. What say you?

Brigadier: “I am Brigadier Lethbridge-Stewart. Surrender now and we can avoid bloodshed.”

And then . . .

Brigadier: “Let me see if I’ve understood you correctly. You are holding a Remembrance ceremony for the dead of our World Wars, a ceasefire to remain in force for the duration of said ceremony, right?”

Morgaine: “Your words are strange, but that is the meaning, yes.”

Brigadier: “Right. What must I do?”

And finally . . .

Morgaine: “I wish you to know that I bear you no malice.”

Brigadier: “I understand.”

Morgaine: “But when we meet again, I shall kill you.”

They meet, discourse, and part in mutual respect. Equals.

It makes me long for those Third Doctor UNIT serials all over again. If only Morgaine had been around in those days. What a show it would have made.

Morgaine saves Battlefield, but she is wasted in Battlefield. Battlefield is a pitiful battlefield upon which to fight. The Doctor effectively points this out in his stirring anti-nuclear speech. "Not a war between armies nor a war between nations, but just death; death gone mad,” he argues; and he continues, “Is this honor? Is this war? Are these the weapons you would use? Tell me!”

“No,” is Morgaine’s resounding answer as she aborts the missile launch.

And then the Doctor truly crushes her. “Arthur, who burned like star fire,” is not only dead; he is “gone to dust.”

“Then I shall not even have that comfort,” Morgaine mourns.

There is no honor in this battle; there is no comfort. Battlefield is not the proper stage for these noble characters.

Which brings me to the Brigadier.

Battlefield was meant to be the death of the Brigadier. The stage was set; the groundwork was laid. The Brigadier, at home with Doris in his comfortable retirement: “Tell them I’ve decided to fade away.” But the name of the Doctor (“There are many secrets in names”) lures the Brig into one last adventure.

“You don’t need to go on playing soldier anymore,” Doris says as the Brig dons his uniform in preparation. “I’m not playing,” he responds.

“I just can’t let you out of my sight, can I Doctor?” One last Doctor for the Brigadier to meet. Recalling those past glory years the show reintroduces Bessie, taken out of mothballs, as well as referencing Liz Shaw. (Where is the Third Doctor when you need him? I had my problems with Doctor Number Three, but oh what I wouldn’t give . . .).

“Well, nothing ventured, Doctor,” the Brigadier says as he futilely pumps several rounds into the Destroyer and then gets blasted for his efforts (“That was uncalled for.”). That is the Brigadier, always game, always up for the venture.

The Destroyer is not done; the Doctor is not done; the Brigadier is not done. The Destroyer is poised to take on the world; the Doctor is poised to take on the Destroyer; the Brigadier is a match for them both: “Sorry Doctor, but I think I’m rather more expendable than you are.”

The Destroyer: “Ah, little man, what do you want of me?”

Brigadier: “Get off my world.”

This is the Brigadier’s shining moment. This is the Brigadier in all his glory. This is the Brigadier facing down Earth’s mortal enemy.

Destroyer: “Pitiful. Can this world do no better than you as their champion?”

Brigadier: “Probably. I do the best I can.”

This smacks of the Brigadier’s last stand. The Brigadier might be pitiful in the Destroyer’s eyes, but the best of the Brigadier is the best this world could ask for.

Doctor: “You stupid, stubborn, pig-headed numbskull. You were supposed to die in bed. I could have handled it, done your job.”

Brigadier: “Nonsense Doctor.”

Doctor: “You’re supposed to be dead.”

Brigadier: “Oh really, Doctor. You don’t think I’d be so stupid as to stay inside, do you?”

Doctor: “Well . . .”

Brigadier: “Really Doctor, have a little faith. Ace?”

Ace: “Yes Brigadier?”

Brigadier: “I’m getting too old for this sort of thing. He’s all yours from now on. I’m going home to Doris.”

By all rights the Brigadier should be dead. The stage was beautifully set. It would have been a noble death. Morgaine and the Destroyer are two formidable foes worthy of the Brigadier. Battlefield, however, is not the worthy stage. The story of Battlefield did not do the Brigadier justice; it is for the Brigadier to do Battlefield justice and he does just that and comes out victorious to live another day.

If only our own scripts could be rewritten, Gary  . . .