Time and the Rani

Dear Gary—

Time and the Rani is an inauspicious start for Sylvester McCoy. It opens with a rubbish regeneration scene, and the lack of care and respect taken with it does not bode well. It is followed up with a horrendous new opening theme and title sequence. The ensuing story is good only by comparison.

I do have to say that Sylvester McCoy is an immediate improvement on his predecessor. He is overly theatrical to start, but he settles in nicely to the role as the serial progresses. It’s curious that he doesn’t notice that he has regenerated until he catches a glimpse of his reflection. His comically humble reaction—“Me? No wonder I’ve lost my memory”—is endearing and makes the Doctor accessible once again. His malapropisms are amusing at first, but their overuse becomes annoying. (Speaking of overuse—Mel’s scream.)

I like that he spends some considerable time in the Sixth Doctor’s too big costume. Without Colin Baker on hand for the regeneration, we at least have his unmistakable coat as stand-in. The Seventh Doctor, swimming in layers of colorful fabric and unfazed by his new body, demonstrates that he is indeed the Doctor as he recognizes the Rani and starts working out what evil plan she has brewing. Even under the influence of the Rani’s amnesia inducing drug his detective mind remains at work, continually questioning and reasoning. It has been a while since the Doctor has been this quick witted, especially right out of the box.

When the Doctor finally gets around to changing his attire it is a big improvement, and I instantly accept this new persona. However the scene itself is a bit of a ‘been there, done that’ let down.

Mel, when she isn’t screaming (which isn’t often,) is tolerable. I do enjoy the scene when she first sees this seventh incarnation and the two have to convince each other of their identity, and I like some of her exchanges with Ikona; Ikona is at his best when he is being befuddled.

I enjoy the Rani in this story, too. Her Mel impersonation is laughable but highly entertaining, and her Rani moments of impatience with the Doctor are the highlight of her act. Her schemes, on the other hand, leave something to be desired. I think she spent too much time with the Master (and how did the two of them get out of their last predicament I wonder?) and has picked up a bit of his convoluted thinking.

In her last story, Mark of the Rani, the Master was trying to convince her to utilize some of the great minds of nineteenth century Earth. She has apparently adapted this plan to her current machinations. It was true then and it’s true now—how can these few intellects, no matter how brilliant, be a match for two much less one Time Lord? The collection she has—Pasteur, Einstein, Hypatia—is limited in knowledge and time. If she is really serious about this, shouldn’t she get more modern beings who have the benefit of historical knowledge of Einstein’s theories combined with up-to-date technology and concepts? And really, with the many egos involved she should have expected the inevitable arguments to break out.

She goes through all of this just so that these minds can concoct a formula for creating a lightweight version of strange matter. How is it that when this formula is complete she has the resources on hand to produce this new substance on the spot? Her ultimate plan is to recreate a super nova which will in turn create helium two and after a bit of gibberish somehow she will have a time manipulator so that she can go back to the Cretaceous age to aid the dinosaurs. Couldn’t she cut out a few steps and have her captives come up with a way to produce helium two? Or to invent a time manipulator that isn’t as involved? Better yet, why not become a time manipulator herself ala the Meddling Monk? What does she need a machine for (other than her TARDIS)?

Despite the complicated nature of her plan, I can’t for the life of me figure out what she needs the Lakertyans for, and in particular Beyus. Beyus does absolutely nothing. He spends his time standing around. Occasionally he pushes some buttons, but can’t the Tetraps do that just as well, or the Rani herself?

“The computer control needs constant monitoring,” Beyus tells the Rani. “I can’t manage alone.” Beyus gets lonely standing around doing nothing all day; he wants some company. He has taken this standing around to a high art. When the Doctor is working his magic on the giant brain and there is a countdown to death they are racing against, Beyus nobly steps forward. “I know what I have to do,” he tells the Doctor as everyone leaves the chamber but Beyus. Stoically he stands. Doing what he does best. Nothing. Kablam! The brain explodes while Beyus just stands there doing nothing except getting himself blown up for no apparent reason.

There is no apparent reason for much of anything in Time and the Rani. Like the Rani’s booby traps. They exist for the spectacular special effect they produce and for an opportunity for Mel to scream her bloody head off. Why the Rani set them, though, is beyond me. Faroon is allowed to come and go as she pleases, and the Tetraps roam about the place; any one of them could easily trip a wire. One of the traps does effectively eliminate Sarn, but that brings me to why does Sarn run to begin with? That was a pointless little escapade. And speaking of Sarn, the Doctor displays more emotion at the sight of her “sad skeleton” than her own father does at her loss.

The ‘renegade’ Ikona is another useless character. His idea of rebellion is to wander around trailing after strangers who appear on his planet. He is a tad more active than his leader Beyus, but not much more effective. But then the two seem to be indicative of Lakertyans in general. The Rani, in her Mel disguise, tells the Doctor, “The benevolent climate has induced lethargy.” The only lie in that statement is that the climate on this rock quarry of a planet is benevolent. The Lakertyans are indolent on their own; content to emulate their leader by sitting around in their Center of Leisure. They don’t need any coercion to cooperate; just give them a spot to sit. The killer insects stocked in the globe don’t seem necessary, and if there were any concern the problem is easily dealt with—simply leave and close the doors behind them. But no, they would rather loll around with a globe of death over their heads.  If the Rani is really using these people as a labor force there is no evidence of it.

About those killer insects. The Doctor sensibly locates and swipes the Rani’s antidote and graciously offers it to the Lakertyans; Ikona thanklessly dumps it on the ground. Who elected Ikona ruler anyway? What right has he to make this reckless decision that they must “meet their own challenges?”  Given their idle ways, that’s a tall order. If they are to survive they could use all the help they can get.

The Rani could get along splendidly without the Lakertyans and so could I, although Faroon does have a quiet dignity about her and I actually do like their elaborate costumes and makeup. At least it is an attempt to make humanoids slightly different; they remind me in a way of the inhabitants of The Leisure Hive—I wonder if the two races are related in any way. The monsters of the week, the Tetraps, are a decent stab at it that doesn’t quite work, and they too seem superfluous, except for a means of giving the Rani her just desserts.

In the end, Sylvester McCoy keeps me engaged in the story. “Perhaps this is my new persona: sulky; bad tempered,” the Doctor says as he feels his way through this new generation. And then, “The more I know me, the less I like me,” as he is being spoon fed information by the Rani. But in the end: “I’ll grow on you, Mel. I’ll grow on you.” He has already grown on me. He is personable, compassionate, clever, and humorous. Everything I want in my Doctor.

“A miss is as good as a smile,” as the Doctor would say, and Time and the Rani is a miss, but as good as a smile. I send this out with a smile, Gary, hoping it doesn’t miss you . . .